Running Into Myself: Engineer Meets Soul

You know that feeling that you get when you’re talking about something that you really care about? When you’re energy level shoots to 10, and you can feel your cheeks tighten from smiling so much? When the person you are talking to is getting excited just because of how excited you are? In those moments, the words seem to flow organically. I don’t have to think so hard about what I’m saying. I’m not worried about how I am perceived, or whether I’m right or wrong – I am connected to myself. I had one of those experiences this week, and I think I have a hunch as to why it happened.

The other day, I was running in Frick Park, and the snow-covered trails reminded me of Montana. As a small speck amidst the vastness of the mountains, you can’t help but surrender, and have faith in the journey. Away from the frenetic pace of the city, the quiet, calmness of my natural surroundings allowed me to search "my innernet": to hear the totality of my inner voice, to acknowledge my feelings and reflect on what is important to me. It’s funny how sometimes, when you stop thinking and start feeling, when you stop doing and start listening, when you stop worrying and start trusting, when you turn inward for guidance instead of outward… the answers just sort of come to you.

So this week, when I was in Farouk’s office, I just started talking and I felt myself getting excited. I had been grappling with this question of how I might be able to do the things I love to do while working for a cause I believe in. And I realized that once I stopped thinking about what people might expect of me, or what I may expect from myself as a means of conforming to those societal expectations, I began to realize that I really do know what I love to do, and what I care about.

I love working at the intersection between sustainable technology, and community need – figuring out how to implement development projects that are culturally sensitive, and appropriate for the community. I heard the following story at an EWB conference, and I think it illustrates this idea perfectly…

One of the very first projects that an EWB chapter worked on after the organization was established involved a water distribution system in an African village. The motivation behind the project was that the women spent hours each day walking to fetch water from a source several miles away, which prevented them from doing other things in the village that might allow them to generate an income for their families. So the project team brought the water to the people so that women need only walk to a village tap a short distance from their homes in order to get water. A year later when the team returned to evaluate the success of the project, they found a rusted tap that the women had broken intentionally. They learned that, although the water was more accessible, the women missed the time they spent together walking to collect water for their families. It was the one time during the day when they could escape from their husbands and children, and talk about girl things.

I want to develop relationships with people and families. I want to ensure that the projects we are implementing are environmentally, economically, and socially sustainable, and that they are designed in partnership with the community. I’ve come to realize that the most effective, sustainable change will come from the men and women of the community, and not from a foreigner. And so I think the best thing I can do is to help lift people (who spend their days worrying about whether they will have enough food and water to survive the night, and do not have the freedom to think about the future) up onto the first rung of the ladder out of poverty, so that they can begin climbing on their own. At the Clinton Global Initiative University conference that I went to in Austin, Texas, Bill Clinton phrased it beautifully: We want to work ourselves out of a job. Yep, that’s what I want to do.

So… what does this kind of community development look like? What skills will I need to develop in order to play this role? What resources will be useful to me? Hopefully, if I continue to listen, and trust, and be – if I actively practice running into myself throughout my life as I grow and change and learn – I will stumble upon opportunities that will allow me to “collect” these skills and resources.